Adventures in Scotland!
 In
search of history, heritage and good haggis, I, Terry
Lee-Napier Lorance of the ancient Clan Napier, did,
with my fair Lady Buttercup (i.e. Marilyn), undertake
a most excellent adventure into the fair lands of Scotland.
Having successfully invaded fortified castles, repelled
attacks from TSA airport security (they FRISKED Lady
Buttercup!), and fended off U.S. Customs Agents (we
got to keep the banana!), I respectfully submit the
following after-action report for your review:
Edinburg Castle.
Let me begin by saying that EVERYTHING in Scotland
is old. Or, rather, EVERYTHING here in the New World
is young. The Scots have fresh haggis that is older
than the American Colonies. Lady Buttercup and I gave
up on storming castles built after the 18th Century;
after all, who goes to the Old Country to look at new
homes?!
Beginning in Edinburgh, we stealthily
accessed the city by pretending to be tourists. After
four days of intelligence gathering, we easily took
the Castle during a down-pouring rain. [It always rained
when we stormed a castle...] Although Din Eidyn (renamed
to Edinburgh in 638) dates back to the Stone Age, the
castle only dates to the 11th Century. Coincidently,
William de Napier (my ancestor) was governor of Edinburgh
Castle in 1401; his son was Provost of Edinburgh in
1437; in 1862, another Napier was knighted into the
Order of the Thistle; and a Napier is buried in historic
St. Giles Cathedral. We also enjoyed a grand visit to
the fortified home of John Napier, better known as John
of Logarithms. He gave us logarithms (duh) and the decimal
point, and there is a display in his honor in the National
Museum of Scotland. During a 20th Century restoration
of the home, a Jacobite cannonball was found lodged
in the upper wall near the ramparts. Exhausted from
plundering Edinburgh, Lady Buttercup led us on a refreshing
tour of the Royal Botanic Gardens. Exquisite!
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View of Edinburgh |
Lady Buttercup at the
Royal Botanic Gardens |
Lady Buttercup and I then moved north
to Kinross where we “kitted up” (stayed
overnight) at a 250-year-old stone carriage house. We
also meandered into the village where we slipped quietly
into Jock’s Bar. Jock’s (meaning “soldiers”)
is the pub-home of the Black Watch. Our reputation preceded
us and we found the locals quite amiable. Next morning,
we left Kinross without incident and journeyed north
again into Perth. Perth is the home of Scone  Palace
and the former home of the Stone of Destiny. Scot kings
and queens have been crowned while seated on this stone
since before Robert the Bruce in the 1300’s. A
Napier lies buried in the palace cemetery. The palace
is surrounded by lovely manicured gardens of spectacular
dimensions. Surprising, old growth Douglas Firs are
plentiful, as they were, planted by none-other-than
David Douglas during one of his trips home from the
Pacific Northwest. At this point in our journey I began
developing a love of high-walled gardens.
At our next stop, Kingussie, I had the pleasure of
joining some of the local folk for some black powder
shooting. I am pleased to share that I gave a rather
acceptable accounting for myself. Lady Buttercup and
I then visited Ruthven Barracks, built as a military
presence during the Jacobite Risings. Ironically, the
Jacobites set fire to the barracks on their retreat
from Culloden. Leaving our new friends at Kingussie,
we traveled to Inverness and Culloden. In 1746, Culloden
was the last stand of Bonnie Prince Charlie and the
Jacobite Risings, and the site of barbaric massacres
following the battle. This brought about a brutal end
to the feudal Highlander way of life.
View from Skye.
Lady Buttercup and I were a bit introspective when
we left Culloden, so we headed over to the Eilean Donan
Castle where Lochs Long, Duich, and Alsh meet. This
is the most photographed castle in Scotland. Wow! Then,
on toward the Isle of Skye. Skye culture dates back
to the days of the Druids and includes standing rune
stones and more castles to storm. We marched fearlessly
into Dunvegan Castle, home to Clan McLeod. We then strolled
along the pleasant paths (in the rain, of course!) of
the incredible Dunvegan gardens. At Armadale, we also
dropped by the Clan Donald castle ruins. Although there
was no plunder, Lady Buttercup and I thoroughly enjoyed
time in their charming walking gardens. We then caught
the ferry back to the mainland at Maileig and proceeded
on toward Ft. William, Glencoe, and the Great Glen.
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Wallace Sword |
Terry in the door of Merchiston
Castle - home of John Napier |
The Great Glen is a 73-mile long volcanic rift, carved
out by massive glaciers, that encompasses breathtaking
meadows, steep green hills (“Bens”) covered
by heather, and tranquil lochs (“locks”).
The Great Glen also has many adjoining glens. Often,
a narrow valley is flanked by hills that rise quite
sharply from the valley floor. A “must see”
for anyone traveling to Scotland.
This led us to Callandar for a night and, then, Stirling.
Stirling... home of the jewel of all Scottish castles,
Stirling Castle. Many a Scottish monarch lived at or
visited Stirling Castle in the past 1500 years. A Napier
helped defend the castle in 1304 against Edward I. William
Wallace, Guardian of Scotland, trounced the English
at Stirling Bridge in 1297 [at 66” in length,
his sword is another “must see” housed in
the nearby Wallace Monument!]. In 1314, Robert the Bruce
defeated the English, again, at Bannockburn. Not really
ready to move on, we reluctantly left Stirling for our
next stop, the “bonnie bonnie banks o’ Loch
Lomond.”
On Loch Lomond.
Balloch, located on the southern tip of Loch Lomond,
served as headquarters for the next few days. From Balloch,
we took a boat out to Inchmurrin, island home of the
Lennox Castle ruins (Malcolm, Earl of Lennox was renamed
John Napier by proclamation of the king in the 13th
Century). While at Loch Lomond, we enjoyed another castle
(in the rain) and some more gardens. [Hey, being a marauding
invader is hard work!]
 Cardross,
south of Balloch and west of Glasgow, was a highlight.
We visited the ruins of Castle Kilmahew, domicile of
John Napier in the 1300’s and his son Duncan in
the 1400’s. John often shared his home with neighbor,
King Robert the Bruce. Historic documentation shows
that when Robert the Bruce passed away, his funeral
procession began at Kilmahew Chapel and parts of him
are buried not far from there. Napiers donated the land
for the chapel in the late 1200’s and Duncan rebuilt
Kilmahew Chapel in 1467. He is buried in the chapel
walls. Kilmahew is of particular interest since it was
a Napier from the Kilmahew branch of the family who
came to America in the early 1600’s. I am particularly
appreciative of the Kilmahew Napiers!
In Glasgow, the road system nearly got the best of
us! An heavy industrial city that grew from 14,500 to
400,000 in just 70 years, Glasgow appears to have been
planned specifically to confuse the attacking Clansman
and Lady Buttercup. Aye, it worked quite well! Between
battles (“hooting” seems to be the Glasgow
drivers’ salute to sightseers!), we happened upon
an absolutely serene museum and gardens known as the
Pollak House. This was such a respite! With everything
from groomed gardens to Polo, prehistoric artifacts
to Highland Cows, we could have easily stayed for days.
As it was, our visit time grew short and our hearts
grew sad. I shall miss tea and cakes at 4 p.m.!
After successfully completing our dangerous but rewarding
mission, Lady Buttercup and I bid farewell to Scotland
and set sail (wing?) for the Americas. “We’ll
be back!”
Oh, I almost forget to mention the haggis! Scottish
haggis (lamb lung, sheep innards and oats – sounds
yummy!) is ... well... great on toast! Hmmm….
light, less filling, “Excuse me, miss, can you
bring me a Haggis Light? Oh, and how about one for my
friend, here?!”
Well, that’s the report. Yours aye...
Terry Lee-Napier Lorance and his fair Lady Buttercup
The NW St. Andrew's Society would like to thank
Terry Lee-Napier Lorance and his fair Lady Buttercup
for this wonderful report (which was originally presented
at a Society Social complete with color slide presentation!)
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